We haven’t gotten ‘round to getting that new huge bed…not even the chance to window-shop for one. The past week has been chaotic (to the point of toxic) in the office/lab: a synthesis of so many things going on at once.
1) My boss left (today) for a new (long-term) research post in Japan. Leaving behind an important project that he’s still very much involved with, something he’ll work on via “remote access” through me. (makes me nervous!)
2) Raine and I went on a quick trip to Bicol for my job interview where we spent two nights in the bus. Though physically exhausting for me, Raine enjoyed it a lot (for some reason he’s crazy about riding buses!), especially seeing lolo and lola again even for just a day.
3) I didn’t get accepted as a WYD volunteer! (but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to Europe/Germany in the near future)
4) Hunting (out-of-country) jobs.
5) Generally keeping “afloat” at where I’m at.

These… and all the mundane daily things that is equally important. Emergencies, big and small revolving mostly around Raine: like convincing him to have another haircut; dealing with his sudden fear of lizards and cockroaches and constantly reminding him of a few important things:
1) that he is not Spiderman, thus should stop climbing up the window grills
2) that wrestling is not one of mommy’s favorite plays
3) that he cannot watch “Ice Age” or “Finding Nemo” the whole day (mommy has to watch something else too!)
4) that ice cream is not for breakfast
5) that it’s not polite to call anybody “hoy!”
6) that “pansit”, powdered milk or sugar is not ulam
7) that’s he’s too young to operate the laptop, thus should wait ‘till mommy arrives before his favorite vcd can be played 8) that he can go to (pre)school the moment he turns three

Now, feeling more like Sheeva (or Shiva?–the goddess with 7 pairs of hands) which led me to a few head-knocking realizations:
1) career-wise, the only movement you can go is up and never down, otherwise you stay where you are (or quit altogether)
2) never settle for less, be it a job or person
3) change is constant and some good things never last
4) I’m still terrible at goodbyes
5) I still cry a river over movies

Speaking of movies, I got to steal a few of my sleeping hours and was able to watch something not-Disney, not-Dreamworks and not-Pixar and in turn picked up some lines that shoots straight to the heart:
From “Shall We Dance”: We need a witness to our lives…Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness.

From “Mona Lisa Smile”: Not all who wanders are aimless, especially not those who seek the truth…beyond traditions…beyond definitions…beyond image.

My heart is heavy…and full…and loved.